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Friday, May 5, 2006

My Mother Taught Me......

A little humor as mother’s day approaches May 5, 2006
My Mother Taught Me.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You’d better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
“Because I said so, that’s why.”
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck,you’re not going to the store with me.”
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM .
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world whodon’t have wonderful parents like you do.”
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
“Just wait until we get home.”
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
“You are going to get it when you get home!”
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”
19. My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
“When that lawnmower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
“You’re just like your father.”
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.”
Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”
25. And my favorite: my mother taught me about JUSTICE.
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!”

Monday, May 1, 2006

May 2006

May 2006
Our good news is that we finished the workbook and work sheets to start our home study! I turned it in yesterday, so we are officially starting our home study! What is next? You guessed it waiting. What are we going to do while we are waiting? Yesterday, I ordered 6 yards of good black dirt for our gardens and gardens to be. I think that will keep us busy for a few days. Pray we will not have rain. That would be messy. Pat will be at drill this weekend so I guess I have a lot of work to do!Our waiting time for this phase is not so bad. First, our file needs to be sent by snail mail to the agency to CR. It will take a week for the Social Worker to read and study the 160+-page workbook and our 24+ work sheets that we filled out over the rainy weekend. After that, we will set up our first home study appointment and then away we go onto the next steps of our journey. The home study can take from two to four months to complete. In the meantime, I will garden. Our oldest will be moving back from college tomorrow. He has not spent a full summer home in five years. For the last five years, he has been working at Camp Wapsie first as a camp counselor and then as the Camp’s aquatics director. He has decided this year that he needs a real job so he is assistant manager of aquatics at the CR country club. He is moving up but it always seems to be around water and children. Having him home for the summer will be a blessing and a curse. I will love having him home. His brothers on the other hand have to readjust to a new pecking order and may not always appreciate having him in the house as much as we do. Life is always an adventure at our house. I wouldn’t change it for the world.